Lawn Care Business Forum Lawn Care Business Book Lawn Care Business Blog Lawn Care Software
Home Forum Contract & Flyer Templates Blog Software Videos Podcast Calculators / Estimators Store Mower Review Design It Yourself Lawn Business School

Go Back   GopherHaul Landscaping & Lawn Care Business Marketing Forum > Lawn Care, Landscaping, and Property Management Forums > General Talk

General Talk If it doesn't fit anywhere else, post it here.

You guys will love this!


General Talk

If it doesn't fit anywhere else, post it here.
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #1  
Old 08-30-2009, 02:22 PM
CHEESE2009 CHEESE2009 is offline
Dr. Scott - Ruler of the Underworld
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Switzerland, Grindelwald
Age: 74
Posts: 4,475
Rep Power: 0
CHEESE2009 is on a distinguished road
Talking You guys will love this!

As member of the month, I believe it is my duty to tell all of you a good story!

This story is about my "uncle" & my "aunt"

For the past few years most of the family has noticed some changes about my uncles appearance. When we have family get togethers every few weeks, the following have been noticeable changes & discoveries;

1. He shaved his head bald, alright normal... Doesn't look bad. He also started to sport some earrings, looked like Mr. Clean.

2. He shaved his arms. I guess it was just proper maintenance, he hasn't had a girl in his life for a long time!

3. His nails were never cut. Hmmm, it happens? I guess they grow fast?

4. For Halloween he dressed like a woman, he dressed like a woman VERY well.

5. His cell phone contacts included one which said, "Sex Identification" or something between those lines.

6. He created a Facebook account under a female name, with a picture of him in his Halloween costume.

7. His daughter found a dress in his closet (when she visited him), he said it was a gift for her. Lol.

8. His voice mail message (answer machine) was clearly a female talking.

9. Can't say, too mean.

10. Putting the first few pieces together, it was obvious. Bald to better fit a wig, long nails, shaved body hair, etc.

So the family has basically forced him to come out. We all sent him emails regarding his situation & let him know if we can accept the way he is, or banish him from our family.

He has 5 sisters, he's the only male of all of his siblings.

He's emailed everyone who emailed him, explaining how it is not his fault. Apparently when we are born, we are all female until certain chemicals come together, testosterone. Apparently he didn't get enough testosterone. Hmmm.

So I have been good friends with my uncle in the past. He is also into starting up several small businesses. He's taken a "genius test" & had past it. He can be a prick, but a genius one at that.

I decided to send an email saying that his changes have not affected me, he is family & if anyone has a problem with the way you are, they better look in the mirror. Then I went along writing pages of stuff basically taking my mind off the fact he was now my aunt. Showing that I am able to get over it & still have a good time.

Other family members have chosen a different path, totally ignoring him & being embarrassed. Understandable.

So my Uncle/Aunt has written me back vice-verse, we decided to hang out.
He told me all about his new place. Big arse apartment, big flat screen, tons of Nintendo Wii games. Etc.

So I was interested, already we have things in common, business, wii games, beer.

So yesterday he/she said he/she would pick me up, cool. He/she did that & the evening went well. His/her friend Joe was there & basically looked like this was old news & it didn't bug Joe at all.

I have to say that after 5 minutes of seeing my uncle dressed like a woman, it didn't bother me. I actually forgot that it was weird & things were not awkward. We played Wii, watched DVD's, had dinner, played more Wii, walked the dogs, then I went home.

So he's not 100% female, he still needs a sex change which is scary to imagine. Though he/she said that they aren't interested in guys, & would just be single forever. Alright, you did 100 years without a woman, you could go a little longer!

I looked up sex change procedures & almost past out. Imagine losing your tool? That's awful!!! Don't look it up!!!!!

Anyway, my uncle/aunts place is actually HUGE. Every closet has female clothes, one room is packed with girl shoes, about 100 pairs not even kidding!

A room is full of wigs, etc.



Most of my family thought I would be the one most disturbed about this, being that I follow a very male lifestyle. I sport a beard regardless of the occasion, I looked like Jesus hungover at my cousins wedding while everyone looked clean & shaved. I drink & fart any chance I get, laundry is something to do, just not for me. If I'm out in the rain in a pair of clothes, they are now clean. So I'm apparently a stereotype for men, & the family thought I would be cruel to my uncle. I'm careless & have a cold heart when it comes to woman & they're feelings, basically be quiet or I'm leaving, "Your problems don't matter to me, deal with them on your own time". I'm a prick 50% of the time. But I'm usually easy going with any type or form of person. I was paired with a *** person while working at a store, had no choice but to bond & get work done. I realized *** people are positive & uplifting, great sense of humor. So whatever, I've made some homo friends & it hadn't bothered me.

UNTIL (part two of the story)

My best friend from birth, my drinking buddy & side kick confronted me one night, "I am bisexual" he said. I called it a night & went home laughing. The next day I called to hang out just to pick his brain. Nothing special, he's just attracted to everything I guess! He said, "don't you ever find guys attractive?" LMAO, I then said, "well a lot of trannies look better than most woman, I guess you caught me there!"

so were on good terms again, I'm ignoring the facts. Though one night over an online chat he came on to me & I said, "I don't blame you, I'm beautiful" and I went to sleep, lmao.

Holy cow man... The people in my life are getting weird!!!!!!!!


HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE STORY!

- Scottisha, Scottawna, Scottabitha.. LMAO
Reply With Quote

Stop guess-timating. Learn how to estimate and make money! $$$
Mow Time Estimator Lawn Care Price Estimator Mulch and Topsoil Calculator Snow Plow Estimate Calculator


  #2  
Old 08-30-2009, 06:29 PM
Little's's Avatar
Little's Little's is offline
Brandon
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Shasta Lake CA.
Posts: 814
Rep Power: 8
Little's is on a distinguished road
Default

Lawn care business tipsLawn Care Business Book
hahahahahahahah
Reminds me of the line of that new country song.
"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy."
__________________
Northern California
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-30-2009, 07:32 PM
Steve's Avatar
Steve Steve is offline
Administrator
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 37,343
Rep Power: 10
Steve has disabled reputation
Default

Quote:
4. For Halloween he dressed like a woman, he dressed like a woman VERY well.
7. His daughter found a dress in his closet
What guy doesn't dress like a woman at least once a week LOL, Hell I just might do the next GopherHaul Show with a long flowing blond Wig

Maybe like this one

__________________
- Subscribe to my Lawn Care Marketing Blog Feed and get daily tips sent to you. Free!
Download your Free trial of Gopher Lawn Care Software.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-30-2009, 10:14 PM
kdexpd's Avatar
kdexpd kdexpd is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: N.E. Missouri
Age: 35
Posts: 198
Rep Power: 7
kdexpd is on a distinguished road
Default

LOL!!! Breeze you kill me with your stories! You really should pursue writing as a main hobby. You could be the next author of "Mowing For Dummies"
I am envious of your ability to compose these comical posts!

Steve - I would pay you cash money if you did your next Gopherhaul show dressed as a woman. But you have to have the woman lisp, and your episode has to be about the bikini lawn care services and you have to be in the video mowing in the bikini.
You don't have a hair on your butt if you don't do it!!
LMFAO!!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 09-01-2009, 10:24 PM
fieroboi's Avatar
fieroboi fieroboi is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Camrose, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 142
Rep Power: 7
fieroboi is on a distinguished road
Default

LMAO .... That is quite the story Breeze! I have known many *** people in my life as well, and I agree with you in many ways ... In my experience they are usually the life of the party and have amazing senses of humour! I have to applaud you for your position with your Uncle/Aunt.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kdexpd View Post
Steve - I would pay you cash money if you did your next Gopherhaul show dressed as a woman. But you have to have the woman lisp, and your episode has to be about the bikini lawn care services and you have to be in the video mowing in the bikini.
You don't have a hair on your butt if you don't do it!!
LMFAO!!!!!
And as far as Steve doing a show in a bikini .... (painful as it might be on the eyes) ... it might be worth seeing!!!! LOL
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 09-02-2009, 11:24 PM
Little's's Avatar
Little's Little's is offline
Brandon
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Shasta Lake CA.
Posts: 814
Rep Power: 8
Little's is on a distinguished road
Default

hahahaha
funniest thread ever!
__________________
Northern California
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
i love this site but....... lawn-guy General Talk 11 04-24-2009 08:14 AM
I love this site! lawnsalonforyou Introduce Yourself 3 12-28-2008 08:56 PM
Doing what you love Steve General Business Discussions 0 11-26-2006 01:39 AM
I love emailing tiedeman Gopher Software Support Archived Question & Answers - Read Only 2 11-23-2006 09:35 AM
Standing out and doing what you love Steve General Business Discussions 12 08-11-2006 02:11 PM

» Recent Threads
  RatingTitle, Username, & Date Last Post Replies Views
Beginner Mistakes:...
Steve
01-31-2007 11:45 AM
Today 02:02 PM
by ExtremeLawncareServices
36 8,980
More Rain or Less?
Steve
05-20-2015 12:06 PM
Today 01:48 PM
by Matther777
7 124
Irrigation
pboy8634
02-21-2010 12:46 PM
Today 11:39 AM
by Just for Cuts
24 8,344
What's your next...
Steve
05-15-2015 11:54 AM
Yesterday 11:23 PM
by biglee
13 301
Peace garden ideas
SGL1
05-13-2015 03:15 PM
Yesterday 07:51 PM
by avetslawncare
16 438
Equipment dealers
mattthelawnguy
Yesterday 04:33 PM
Yesterday 04:33 PM
by mattthelawnguy
0 37
Show us your stripes
Just for Cuts
Yesterday 03:07 PM
Yesterday 03:07 PM
by Just for Cuts
0 52
problems with a customer
LawnCareMan280
05-19-2015 06:28 PM
Yesterday 02:58 PM
by Just for Cuts
4 131
These are the days on...
ExtremeLawncareServices
01-11-2015 10:41 AM
05-20-2015 09:18 PM
by ExtremeLawncareServices
84 6,698
Total yard rehab
SGL1
04-23-2015 03:59 PM
05-19-2015 08:22 PM
by SGL1
15 757
Say Hello !!!
Steve
03-19-2007 11:18 AM
05-19-2015 04:12 PM
by NinaMarie86
1,223 388,876
New Lawn Service
carmelitaslawnservice
05-19-2015 10:02 AM
05-19-2015 02:51 PM
by Steve
1 82
Landscaper Jailed After...
SGL1
05-18-2015 08:15 AM
05-19-2015 02:37 PM
by Steve
5 172
Pictures of commercial...
avetslawncare
04-01-2015 09:47 PM
05-19-2015 02:29 PM
by Steve
38 1,935
feeling like im being...
Bradcook21
05-17-2015 07:33 AM
05-19-2015 02:11 PM
by Steve
6 189
good news yesterday
Bradcook21
05-17-2015 07:08 AM
05-19-2015 06:16 AM
by Bradcook21
3 122
ignition coil
jasonw
05-12-2015 05:31 PM
05-18-2015 12:07 PM
by Steve
3 244
Anyone need help? I have...
biglee
05-06-2015 12:22 PM
05-18-2015 12:06 PM
by Steve
13 635
Big (to me) mulch job
tl757
04-23-2015 05:32 PM
05-15-2015 08:46 PM
by biglee
22 1,441
big dog mowers?
Bradcook21
05-13-2015 04:03 PM
05-14-2015 10:55 AM
by Steve
4 271
Small HOA Bid
lxarth
05-06-2015 10:37 PM
05-13-2015 11:55 AM
by Steve
9 479
New company in Michigan
SEM
04-24-2015 09:27 PM
05-13-2015 11:51 AM
by Steve
11 610
Fired for refusing to...
Mr. Mow
05-09-2015 06:15 AM
05-12-2015 01:36 PM
by Steve
6 477
What a JERK!
Chilehead
05-06-2015 08:13 AM
05-12-2015 01:14 PM
by Steve
9 548
I have ZERO confidence...
Just for Cuts
05-01-2015 04:24 PM
05-12-2015 03:53 AM
by jrs.landscaping
31 1,020
landscape insurance
clarkslawn
03-30-2015 10:14 PM
05-11-2015 01:15 PM
by Steve
6 991
String trim BEFORE mow...
Mr. Mow
04-12-2015 08:13 AM
05-10-2015 07:50 PM
by ExtremeLawncareServices
9 1,021
Bought my first STIHL...
Mr. Mow
05-09-2015 06:29 AM
05-10-2015 08:36 AM
by Mr. Mow
9 389
advice wanted please and...
CHenricks
05-07-2015 08:40 PM
05-08-2015 04:20 PM
by CHenricks
7 404
Hello
SallyBorowicz
05-06-2015 11:14 AM
05-08-2015 02:21 PM
by Steve
3 323
Mower Advice
tl757
05-06-2015 02:31 PM
05-08-2015 01:45 PM
by Steve
6 442
Home today...Still...
biglee
05-06-2015 11:59 AM
05-07-2015 12:06 PM
by biglee
2 322
I'm Back With The Best...
aduttonater
02-21-2015 12:41 AM
05-07-2015 11:17 AM
by Steve
79 3,870
color fliers?
holymoly
04-18-2015 02:32 PM
05-07-2015 10:57 AM
by Steve
16 999
Looking good
mrsmichigan
05-06-2015 09:47 AM
05-07-2015 10:53 AM
by Steve
1 277
What are your biggest...
Steve
05-05-2015 01:24 PM
05-07-2015 10:52 AM
by Steve
2 317
is craiglist good to...
JBENI
04-16-2015 11:11 AM
05-06-2015 07:15 PM
by TheYardGuy
12 1,067
Go daddy web site and...
jcurr33
05-04-2015 06:00 PM
05-05-2015 11:57 AM
by Steve
2 352
How busy are you now?
Steve
05-04-2015 01:10 PM
05-05-2015 11:47 AM
by Steve
4 387
mowfinder
scaypa
04-27-2015 05:44 PM
05-04-2015 01:14 PM
by Steve
1 417
Latest video, Facebook...
Sprinkler Buddy
05-01-2015 06:54 AM
05-04-2015 01:09 PM
by Steve
3 382
weed
avetslawncare
04-16-2015 07:56 PM
05-01-2015 11:38 AM
by Steve
8 798
so i need somehelp with...
dalvan0
04-28-2015 07:43 PM
04-30-2015 10:55 PM
by avetslawncare
3 684
Anyone have a Lawn Care...
nishirandall
04-28-2015 08:45 PM
04-30-2015 12:00 AM
by Steve
1 458
mowing pic
joshlawncare
04-25-2015 12:34 PM
04-29-2015 10:55 PM
by Steve
5 558
Help with a truck
bdodson89
04-27-2015 08:15 PM
04-29-2015 10:47 PM
by Steve
4 454
Ford F250 Wheel loaders...
jrs.landscaping
04-28-2015 05:34 AM
04-29-2015 07:47 AM
by jrs.landscaping
2 419
Correct me if I'm wrong...
SGL1
04-26-2015 02:41 PM
04-28-2015 06:57 AM
by SGL1
12 576
equipment marketplace?
jrs.landscaping
04-27-2015 04:49 PM
04-27-2015 06:09 PM
by jrs.landscaping
2 393
Buying contracts /...
greenscaper123
04-26-2015 04:46 PM
04-27-2015 05:59 PM
by Steve
2 463
» Popular Tags
aerocore apartment bid apartment lawn care estimate applying auger billy goat brushcutter blades blowout bush curb appeal services deliquentaccounts ditches door hangers employee problems equipment rental estimate facebook ferris foreman free advertising google growing a lawn care business hiring how to husqvarna jobs john deere quik trac landscape landscape services landscaping training lawn lawn care lawn care busines plan managing a lawn care business marketing more customers business mr dave mulch new business new mower per hour service pricing pto scag sell the vision shell shreaded small engine repair snow plowing sq ft square foot starting a lawn care business steep lawns sulky swzt theft toro toro grand stand tractor auger trailer trailer mate pro tree trimmer rack up sell employee web design website website design winterization wood wright stander rh
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.1.0

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:35 PM.


(C) 2011 Riggs Publications - Terms of use & Privacy Policy

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:35 PM.

(C) 2011 Riggs Publications - Terms of use & Privacy Policy