Suicide

[Steve]

I think a big part of it is we put so much on the line when we just quit and start from scratch like i did, and many others have. That is when i think we start thinking about life a little different. Can you tell me more about what you mean?

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Originally Posted by Steve Can you tell me more about what you mean? Well as i have metioned on here before, I used to work for a very lg corp. as a manager for 15 years. In this role i had to make decisions all day long, but my answers were all based off of the corporate guide lines, so how much was I really using my brain? Now on the other hand as a small business owner I really have to think things through in more detail, make my own guide lines, in its own way is rewarding, right or wrong it gives you more of a sense of control. For those in a job, or chasing that dream, how much control do they really have, it all depends on someone they most likely dont know from adam saying yes or no, And more often then not no is the answer they get. I felt i was stuck, could not be happy, hated my job so much seemed endless. Then ine day i just had enough, kids grown, and though i still needed an income i just quite, the after the first month trying to figure out where and what to do, i started my LCO, though time is consumed , i am so much more happy then ever, i feel like i am in control of my own destiny now. So I really think it changes the mind set in the sense that we are not waiting for our ship to come in, we are swimming out to it.

[jackmcmanus21]

I personally think people need to see the fruits of their labor. If you work in an office, you dont really get anything done...you just keep the train rolling. That is why people like construction workers and people in the lawn care industry are happier...they can stand back and admire their work.

[Steve]

That is a very good point.

Originally Posted by jackmcmanus21

I personally think people need to see the fruits of their labor. If you work in an office, you dont really get anything done...you just keep the train rolling. That is why people like construction workers and people in the lawn care industry are happier...they can stand back and admire their work.

YepYep... That is one of the biggest reasons I like it. I used to be one of those people how kept the train rolling for at least 15 years..... Made good $$ but just never was happy with it. I know we all need money and it's important especially with a house paymnent, wife and kids BUT there's so SOOOO much more to it than just money.

I work harder (physically) now than I have in the last 15 years... but it doesnt bother me becuase I enjoy it and i'm happier than being stuck in a office all day...

[MeanGreenCare]

Originally Posted by VPS Lawn Care

Steve, i too lost someone very close to me a few years ago, and it is a hard way to have your eye's opened.

Dreams, Hopes, Desires, the things that we all strive for, work for, struggle for, what are they? Ya know i was just sitting here talking to my wife about this, and she had a very simple, straight forward response, and i quote " Well" she said " I think it all comes down to perspective, the way one looks at the things in there life. I sit here and think, what makes me happy, what do i want out of life, then i stop myself, why focus on wants, when i have all i need" end quote. She got me to thinking, i know what she was saying, we all want lots of things, though they may be diffrent, the want is in all of us. But in life what are the things i need to be happy? is this not the real question we should be asking? I am happy to have food on the table and yes even steak a couple times a month, i am so so happy to have my 3 kids, i am happy to have a roof over our heads, paid for cars to drive, and i am happy to have alot of what we all need even if alot of people don't admit it, LOVE, so should we be looking for what we want, or what we need, and how do we know the diffrence?
is it half empty or half full?

YOUR WIFE NAILED IT ON THE HEAD OF THE NAIL.

Also for you people who think they know what love is or claim to be in "LOVE" I want to share a famous quote I found, and this quote

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident."

[MeanGreenCare]

Sorry to hear about your friend Steve. I been in a situation like that myself. I was lost, confused, and depressed. I thought of it, but never could push myself to it. I seen no point in doing such a thing. I realized much more to life to make you happy. Bad things eventually go away, but happiness is here for eternity.

[Tom53]

Steve, I am really sorry to hear about your friend. There are no words that anyone can say that will totally heal the wounds of anyone, family or friends when something like this happens.

Some people do reach out, and if a person thinks about it, someone who does reach out should be considered as lucky enough to have that strength. Not everyone does have the strength to ask for help and that is a terrible shame.

I have dealt with many suicides and attempted suicides during my career in law enforcement, and I can assure you there is NO single answer as to why anyone would choose this path, and also there is NO simple answer either. The one thing that always came to my mind in these situations, is the person for whatever reason, chose the permanent answer to a temporary problem.

One may never completely heal or get over a mental issue, but there is help and anyone considering suicide should know that someone, and maybe the last person they might normally think of, DOES care and will go to the end of the earth to help if they can. I truly wish your friend had reached out to someone and would have found that strength to get through his issues. He was most likely loved by many more people than he could have dreamed of...and I think almost all of us are.

To you, his friends and his family, I give my condolences and that you all find a way to heal faster.

[Ducke]

Steve Sorry to hear about your friend.
These stories always seem to hit home in two ways for me .
(one)5 years ago I lost my best friend of 33 years gambling did him in.
He was always looking for the quick dollar, Amway, or what ever pyramid
scheme that came along that was him But the VLT's got Him to the tune of $200,000.00
He had finally dug a hole he could not get out of.
Strange thing is he kept it hidden from us all. We did not have a clue till he was gone.

(Two) I suffer from sever depression I some time get in dark funks that can last
for weeks, But I have some of the greatest Friends and Family that a guy could ever want and they watch out for me. I know that the difference between life and death if a razor thin line, I have been there standing on the edge looking down all there is to see is darkness but it seems so much better then the crazy techno color madness of day to day life. But as I had said its my safety net of Friends and family (and some real good drugs) that help me face each day.
April has been a very bad month for me I lost my Mother on April 1st Rain rain rain and tiring to start a new company its been very stressful but I am making it though day by day.
Your friend sounded like a great guy cherish his memory and he will be there for you any time you need him.
It good to talk about it and with that I'm off to get a coffee and talk with the guys and watch the rain, Today is a good day.

Graham

[Steve]

Oh I am sorry about your mom.

I suffer from sever depression I some time get in dark funks that can last
for weeks

Do you ever wonder if depression is something new we deal with because of the society we live in now or do you feel that depression has always been with us through out time?