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View Full Version : Do entrepreneurs have a tougher time with marriage


Steve
02-10-2008, 09:30 AM
I was talking with a friend the other day about entrepreneurs and marriage.

Do you feel entrepreneurs do better at marriages or worse?

If you reflect on the people you know, what would you say about this topic?

Are entrepreneurs easier to get along with or tougher?

FourSeasons
02-10-2008, 11:36 AM
Quote[/b] ]Do you feel entrepreneurs do better at marriages or worse?


I would say on a average worse. I can say from my own experience that the time I have to spend or should be spending with her I'd rather be spending on my business. And during the busy months when I work late and on the weekends that they get neglected.

Some women understand this and support you. Then there are some who find other ways to fill the void from the attention they are not getting. Probably not in good ways eithermost of the time.

Steve
02-10-2008, 11:45 AM
Isn't it a fascinating topic? It kind of makes you wonder what makes us all so driven and then why are we so driven towards business versus relationships!

I wonder at times if part of being the entrepreneur is that you just feel you get the most return on your energy by directing it into such things as business vs. relationships.

Do personal interactions turn us off while our creations (business) turn us on?

Fernando's CleanCut!
02-10-2008, 01:28 PM
Hi guys... I agree with Rob, on this one, as you can see (or hear) most of Music Entrepreneurs (Puff Daddy, Russell, Dr. Dre, Branson) aren't doing too well with marrige, maybe they are spending more time thinking, talking, working on the bussines that spending more time with the other half, or family. (thats my opinion, but like rob said, is just an average)
In my case, im doing the same, im always talking with my wife on how this thing works, on what my ideas are to do better, and this and that, and so far, she hasnt complain about me talking about this all the time, ;) I guess WE are still learning lots of stuff and is entertaining for both of us.

All Aspects Landscaping
02-10-2008, 02:00 PM
interesting topic... when i met my wife 9 years ago... i straight up told her that i was a workaholic and need to be busy all the time... some how some way... we have found the perfect way to make it work... she believes in me... she understand the dinner meeting goes till 9 sometimes... my cell is always answered when she calls... nobody is more important than her... Push comes to shove... id give it all up for her. But this is why she trust me and understands... this is what makes me work till 345 am last night then cook pancakes at 730 for my girls (and my neice)... we have a saying for years now... and it sums up how i feel about her... (and a movie ripped us off)... what baby wants, baby gets

Steve
02-10-2008, 06:34 PM
When you reflect on yourself vs others you know do you find you are more of a workaholic than anyone else?

All Aspects Landscaping
02-10-2008, 07:32 PM
im sure there are guys that work harder than me... but i work and I love my wife...

FourSeasons
02-10-2008, 10:41 PM
Quote[/b] ]Push comes to shove... id give it all up for her.

Thats a pretty strong statement.
I don't think I could give up what I've been working for, for my wife. I am young and have goals and things I want in life.
If she was to try to hold me back at anypoint then I'd have to let her go.

But since she supports me and knows what I am trying to accomplish; most of the time this isn't a issue.

I can't let someone hold me back from what I want to do.
To me no woman is worth dropping everything for.
But they can be a part of it.

Thats just the way I feel.

Steve
02-11-2008, 08:52 AM
That's a fascinating point Rob. I do wonder if part of what makes an entrepreneur break through and find success on a large scale is that they tend to focus more on their work or their creations than they do with their relationships.

I haven't done a poll on this but would you think this to be the case?

All Aspects Landscaping
02-11-2008, 04:48 PM
...just glad ill never have to make that choice...

FourSeasons
02-12-2008, 10:02 AM
Quote[/b] ]I haven't done a poll on this but would you think this to be the case?


I think for alot of us it might be.
One of my best friends started his own nursery about 3 years ago and he is trying to grow it big. It takes up alot of his time and money maintaining everything.
His wife used to be supportive of it until she saw how much time it was taking away from her and going into the nursery. This is something he had started before he met her though. So they end up not getting along very well. She constantly gives him bad feedback about it and stresses him out.

So he told me he's been seriously thinking about letting her go.
I agree. If they dont want to support what you want to do or cant handle not getting all of your time then its time for them to go.

But that goes for friends or anybody that might hold you down.

B7 Enterprise
02-12-2008, 12:55 PM
I would never give up my business for a woman. I am on my second marriage and I figured out that I am not any good at being married. I love my wife and we get along pretty good most of the time.

But the reason we are still together is because she supports me so far. if it came to me giving up my business or giving up her. well....

The reason I feel this way is because I know all women are crazy...lol

my first wife supported me by holding the guy next door next to her body. the woman is satans daughter. I have been divorced for 11 years and I still hate that woman.

Man Steve look what you went and done....LOL

Steve
02-12-2008, 08:30 PM
Well it is a fascinating insight into the topic.

What do you think you get most out of your business? What do you feel it provides you with mostly?

kc2006
02-12-2008, 08:42 PM
I'm not married, but in a serious relationship that will lead to marriage in the soon future.

I just started my business before I met my girlfriend. And it was never an issue that I worked for myself, and she knew that I was still in the early stages and struggling. And shes been supportive all along. Back in the early stages of our dating she did question one time what I had planned as a back up if ever needed, I took alittle offense to it (thought wow she thinks I'm not going to make it) but I then saw where it was coming from. Her family didn't have alot of money at all when they were growing up, her dad didn't like to work I guess. So I think she just didn't want that type of life, and believe me neither do i. So I assured her I'd be successful but in the event that i need to do something, I have many routes to go.

Other then that one time, it's been nothing but support. I've said I was going to just sell the business off and go work somewhere because it'd be easier, and she flipped (i feared for my life!). She really didn't like that at all, and said she wouldn't let me do that because she knows how much I love my business. So it proved to me that she was with me.

So I personally think, if theres a question of "would you get rid of her over your business" you really shouldn't be with her to begin with. I wouldn't dream of giving up on either. That tells me I got a good one.

Not to say there is some stressful times, we live a half hour away from each other and last year we had that huge snow storm and I almost missed our first valentines date, but I got my work done and made it happen for her. Might of been alittle late, but I balanced both worlds.

All Aspects Landscaping
02-12-2008, 09:04 PM
Kurt... you hit the nail on the head... You would wear a pair of boot thats dont fit right?? How bout you steve?? You always seem to come up with compelling topics but seem to evade giving your opinion... lol... anyways, I stand my previous statement... Id give the world up for her... she gave me the two most beautiful daughters a guy could want... When I start work at 7 am, all I think about is getting home to see them. We've been together over 11 years and owner 4 businesses... nothing comes between us... I wish you guys could find half the happiness that I have, youd learn that moneys not the only thing in the world

B7 Enterprise
02-12-2008, 10:26 PM
I always like to hear about true love, but I know that isn't the way it is in most cases. I also know how things change from getting married to being married its like night and day.

Like with my first wife, the day after we were married, it went from on my God I'm married to what the #### did I do. I have never in my life see someone change that fast. I swear a demon came out of her.

and after that it was down hill all the way, it cost 30 bucks to get married and thousands to get divorced. and even after divorced I couldn't get away from her.

It still amazes me to no end how a woman can lie so much and have the law (men) believe everything she says to be true. I actually had a cop tell me once that she tired to have me arrested everyday. she actually got pulled over one day for speeding and told the cop I was chasing her. and I lived two hours away.

I even had a cop come to my work site and look through my truck because she told him I was carrying a shotgun. needless to say I lost that account.

as you can tell this is a touchy subject for me.lol

All Aspects Landscaping
02-12-2008, 10:54 PM
understood

tjgray
02-13-2008, 11:46 PM
How about when you are in business together. My husband and I have jointly ran our lawn company for going on 5 years now...

About half the time he makes me crazy...and I honestly think I seriously dis-like him about once a week...he is very stubborn and makes a lot of decisions that I dis-agree with. Plus we think differently on a lot of subjects.

We just celebrated 20 years of marriage on Jan 25th and I can assure you all that I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world. While my above statements are true, Donald is a hard worker dedicated to me and his kids. When I need him I know I can always count on him to be there for me. My life would be absolutely empty without him in it http://www.gophergraphics.com/forum/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

Fernando's CleanCut!
02-14-2008, 02:01 PM
Hey guys...

Quote[/b] (All Aspects Landscaping @ Feb. 11 2008,5:48)]...just glad ill never have to make that choice...

...well, I think If a woman?wife/girlfriend makes the dessicion of asking you to make such a hard choice, I belive THAT relationship was over Before this question... "what is the most important thing in your life? your family(pops, brothers) or your wife? your carrer or your girlfriend?"
I have told my wife not to put me, or our future, in that spot, never, because I'm not ready to let go something that I love.