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View Full Version : I just might be a failure if...


LawnBoy0311
08-24-2012, 06:59 AM
Heres a thread about all the funny advertisements and things we see out there of companies who just might fail if they keep it up. All funny comments/pictures are welcome! This should be interesting.


I was searching craigslist this morning to search and destroy competition. Here is what I came across....

"ARE YOU LOOKING FOR GOOD WORK AND LOW PRICES HIRE ARE THE DETAIL OF THE CERVICES THAT WI PROVIDE
GRASS MOWING/ CLEAN AP / BUSHES REMOVE / PATIOS / TRIMMING / EDGING / WALLS /MULCHING / SOD GRASS / FOR YOU FREE ESTIMATE JUST CALL AT 7** 2** **** THAKS FOR LOOKING"


Hmmmmm.....I'd certainly hire him.

xandrew245x
08-24-2012, 07:22 AM
There is a local guy around here that uses an old beatup dump truck and a old beat up trailer, but has to brand spankin new john deere residential riders and an older residential rider. Every time I see him I think to myself, you could have bought a nice commercial mower for the price of all of them.

stevef1201
08-24-2012, 07:29 AM
Heres a thread about all the funny advertisements and things we see out there of companies who just might fail if they keep it up. All funny comments/pictures are welcome! This should be interesting.


I was searching craigslist this morning to search and destroy competition. Here is what I came across....

"ARE YOU LOOKING FOR GOOD WORK AND LOW PRICES HIRE ARE THE DETAIL OF THE CERVICES THAT WI PROVIDE
GRASS MOWING/ CLEAN AP / BUSHES REMOVE / PATIOS / TRIMMING / EDGING / WALLS /MULCHING / SOD GRASS / FOR YOU FREE ESTIMATE JUST CALL AT 7** 2** **** THAKS FOR LOOKING"


Hmmmmm.....I'd certainly hire him.


I think ......NOT

LawnBoy0311
08-24-2012, 07:34 AM
Reminds me of a good one....

There is a guy who I always see driving in my town. He has an old Uhaul 16' box truck with a half @$$ pee yellow paint job. EVERY time I see him at the 1 yard he mowes, his 1980's cub cadet lawn tractor is broken down in the front yard and he spends the next few hours with a wrench trying to fix it. This is the first year I've seen him around.

Cashin H&P
08-24-2012, 10:41 AM
There is a guy in my town who rents a uhaul truck and trailer to now out of. I have only seen him at 4 yards. He has an old peace of junk walk behind he does not trim or blow off the drive way. The best part is he doesn't secure his mower and it just slides around the trailer.

Steve
08-24-2012, 11:50 AM
I love on how craigslist, posters go out of there way to say not to waste their time with calls or emails or whatever they feel is a waste of their time. Take for instance this ad. Great example.

http://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/craigslist/2010/blocks.jpg

Lopes Lawn Care
08-24-2012, 01:11 PM
Best craigslist ad ever! He's totally right too!

LawnBoy0311
08-24-2012, 01:23 PM
Did Cheese post that?

brian'slawncare
08-24-2012, 04:28 PM
Did Cheese post that?

HAHA I almost just died!! :D :D :D

jrayb39667
08-24-2012, 07:47 PM
That is the best CL list I have ever seen. I think he and Cheese are very closely related hahahaha.

stevef1201
08-25-2012, 04:35 PM
cant say i disagree with his sentiment about all the crap eamails.

LawnBoy0311
08-25-2012, 09:49 PM
Anyone else have any stories about people ready to fail if they keep up the current work quality/equipment?

Simmo
08-26-2012, 06:01 AM
Funiest add ever... I bet there all gone!

Simmo.

PVMS
08-26-2012, 06:27 AM
Hey Simmo,....you should post one of your free kebab ads lol.;)

Simmo
08-26-2012, 09:33 AM
Hey Simmo,....you should post one of your free kebab ads lol.;)

lol... i was honestly thinking the same thing earlier... i went to look for the add and it has been deleted.

He must have gone out of business over winter :eek:

Simmo.

avetslawncare
08-26-2012, 09:37 AM
affordable lawn care (surounding area n charleston)

Date: 2012-08-25, 4:50PM EDT
Reply to this post

We take care of your yard for a low affordable price.
We do everything that needs to be done n your yard that has to do with lawn care r landscape
We r welling to work the best affordable price
Just call r txt mi at (843)442-8565 my is Jaime
Call r txt for a free estimate
Or for any question

LawnBoy0311
08-27-2012, 05:26 AM
Wow. If your trying to post your ad's, at least make sure you spell everything right!

Its amazing how many ad's are poorly written. I found this one on craigslist today, it was the first ad I clicked on.

"Do you need yard fertilized,mulched, pruned or lawn cut on a regular basis, debris from last fall can be done for a reasonable price. also i cant design and install flower beds around the house"

He Cant design and install flower beds??????? HAHAHAHAHAHA:D

Steve
08-27-2012, 03:38 PM
also i cant design and install flower beds around the house"

LOL what if that marketing method worked HAHAHHAHA

Where you list the things you CAN'T do and then customers call to get you to do it, just to torment you LOL

xandrew245x
08-27-2012, 08:29 PM
I found two craiglist listings around me, they crack me up every time. Here is the first one the title is "is anyone iso lawn care" and this is what he said.

R u looking for very reliable good lawn care services prices very resonable and aleays negotiable

Here is the other one titled "Lawn Care"

I am here to do the job just once or if you need it done on a regular schedule I trim, remove, mow and pretty much anyting else you can need done mose jobs $25

that one wasn't as bad, but he is low balling big time.


I was at a guys house saturday doing some work with the backhoe when a guy shows up to mow his grass. He had an old work horse lawn mower, he did a pretty decent job with mowing, but he mowed close to everything, loaded up and left, no trimming, no blowing off the driveway, nothing, and I was thinking "what kind of business is that"

LawnBoy0311
08-30-2012, 04:50 PM
Well, another one bit the dust.

I used to see a truck driving around, saw him for a few months. It was 4 guys packed into a small toyota truck. Not mexican either. They had 1 push mower in the back, a ryobi trimmer, and a few rakes and such. Maybe they figured out cutting the pay between the 4 of them, they will never turn a good profit. Go figure.

CHEESE2009
08-30-2012, 05:02 PM
I saw this today...

"Professional organic gardener will work in your yard or garden in exchange for fresh home-grown produce. Email for details."

-

http://perform-360.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/wtf-face-2crsqn0-300x251.png


and this...

"I believe that chemicals and power tools have no place in a healthy garden."

LOLLOLOLOL... wtf bro? Gonna go use a reel mower? As if clients actually give a crap about the environment.

LawnBoy0311
09-07-2012, 09:11 AM
Unreal.


http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/mld/lbg/3253202287.html




This guy has had the same ad up for over a month. I wonder why.

wat5150
09-07-2012, 09:18 AM
Unreal.


http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/mld/lbg/3253202287.html




This guy has had the same ad up for over a month. I wonder why.

Unreal. So many people are unrealistic with what they think a service should cost.

xandrew245x
09-07-2012, 09:20 AM
I saw this today...

"Professional organic gardener will work in your yard or garden in exchange for fresh home-grown produce. Email for details."

-

http://perform-360.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/wtf-face-2crsqn0-300x251.png


and this...

"I believe that chemicals and power tools have no place in a healthy garden."

LOLLOLOLOL... wtf bro? Gonna go use a reel mower? As if clients actually give a crap about the environment.

Didn't know it was possible for someone to just organically grow produce on an unknown plot...interesting.

I also saw a guy yesterday with an old beat up truck and an old as dirt trailer, and he had two diesel kubota zero turns. Not saying I know everything about how to run a business but I think I would have upgraded my truck or trailer before adding a second before expensive mower.

LawnBoy0311
09-07-2012, 09:24 AM
Unreal. So many people are unrealistic with what they think a service should cost.

It has to be worse now! That picture was the same one he used a month ago.

LawnBoy0311
03-27-2013, 09:36 AM
...and here we go again!! I found this on craigslist just now...


"GRASS CATTING SERVICES CALL AND LET US IMPROVE YOUR YARD TODAY

WE DO GRASS CUTTING , YARD CLEAN AP , MULCHING , TRIMMING , PATIOS , RETAINING WALLS


GUTTER CLEANING, POWER WASHING , BRICK WORK AND MORE CALL FOR A FREE ESTIMATE XXX XXX XXXX THANK YOU"


Is grass catting mowing over cats? Or cats do the mowing? I have never heard of such service...

wat5150
03-27-2013, 09:44 AM
Cats mowing the yard would be cool. He may be onto something.

djlandscaping06
03-27-2013, 10:51 AM
There is a local guy around here that uses an old beatup dump truck and a old beat up trailer, but has to brand spankin new john deere residential riders and an older residential rider. Every time I see him I think to myself, you could have bought a nice commercial mower for the price of all of them.

Yeah in my area I have seen them working out of their car with a push mower sticking out of the trunk. Cheap hires just looking for a quick buck!

xandrew245x
04-30-2013, 01:41 PM
Came across this on craiglist today

lawn care mowing $20.00 - $20 (Dillsburg/mechanicsburg)
Looking for mowing/landscape jobs.. Mowing starting at $2.00 a yard. Also mulching,trimming,general clean up also call XXX-XXX-XXXX

Mowing from $2-$20 ARE YOU SERIOUS? That is beyond lowballing, have fun making zero profit.

LawnBoy0311
04-30-2013, 02:13 PM
These ad's are hilarious. All the typo's are crazy.


Here is one:

Lawn mowing labor, $35 (Great Falls)

Mow my lawn using my Z turn mower. Prior experience necessary. Takes about 2.5 hours.

•Location: Great Falls
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
•Compensation: $35


This moron has been trying to get someone to do this for 3 weeks now.

xandrew245x
04-30-2013, 02:22 PM
$35 for 2.5 hours of work yea right! Even using his equipment I wouldn't do it for that price.

LawnBoy0311
04-30-2013, 02:24 PM
Here is another good one for you guys.

I've been emailing a guy all morning about maybe buying his lawn business. I was looking for more info on it and here is what I got out of digging for info.

*125+ customers (all the way from VA to Baltimore, MD. For those of you not familiar with the area, its over an hour away! He has customers alllllllll over the place, covering MD, DC, and VA.)
*(2) 48" walk behinds, some push mowers, a 2003 dodge p/u, a 1998 toyota camery, 5 trimmers, and 4 blowers. Various rakes, etc. 2 open trailers and 1 enclosed.

Asking price? $80K. He just started it last year, and claims he's on pace for $150K this year.

Anyone who buys this will be out of business REAL soon.

stevef1201
04-30-2013, 04:44 PM
Here is another good one for you guys.

I've been emailing a guy all morning about maybe buying his lawn business. I was looking for more info on it and here is what I got out of digging for info.

*125+ customers (all the way from VA to Baltimore, MD. For those of you not familiar with the area, its over an hour away! He has customers alllllllll over the place, covering MD, DC, and VA.)
*(2) 48" walk behinds, some push mowers, a 2003 dodge p/u, a 1998 toyota camery, 5 trimmers, and 4 blowers. Various rakes, etc. 2 open trailers and 1 enclosed.

Asking price? $80K. He just started it last year, and claims he's on pace for $150K this year.

Anyone who buys this will be out of business REAL soon.


I jus gess that eh thinks ur toopid

Matther777
04-30-2013, 11:07 PM
HAHAH When I roam the free ads these pop up.

http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775660550.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775858331.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3769908933.html

Yea okay I will just get this free stuff and use my vehicle to get there and use my equipment to get it hhahahaha I don't get it.

SECTLANDSCAPING
04-30-2013, 11:32 PM
HAHAH When I roam the free ads these pop up.

http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775660550.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775858331.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3769908933.html

Yea okay I will just get this free stuff and use my vehicle to get there and use my equipment to get it hhahahaha I don't get it.

Thats about $500 in river rock. If you had a need it would be worth it.

LawnBoy0311
05-01-2013, 06:13 AM
Thats about $500 in river rock. If you had a need it would be worth it.

Didn't Hedge get some free from some guy and turn around and sell it?

LawnBoy0311
05-01-2013, 06:14 AM
HAHAH When I roam the free ads these pop up.

http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775660550.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3775858331.html


http://denver.craigslist.org/zip/3769908933.html

Yea okay I will just get this free stuff and use my vehicle to get there and use my equipment to get it hhahahaha I don't get it.

Those are some damn funny ad's! I want to post "Come mow my grass. You can keep the grass clippings to either smoke, or make a compost pile."

Steve
05-01-2013, 11:45 AM
Asking price? $80K. He just started it last year, and claims he's on pace for $150K this year.

Did he say why he was selling? It be interesting to hear his perspective versus ours here.

LawnBoy0311
05-01-2013, 12:40 PM
He claims because he owns another business and started this looking for a good foreman, but hasn't been able to find one.

I'm trying to talk him waaaaaaaay down on the price. I just broke the news to him its not worth nearly as much as he thinks. And even less because no contracts are in place.

He did say he bought an existing company, hence the reason why the customers are so spread out. But it sounded as if he thought he could buy it and someone else would run it....while he collects the cash.

Steve
05-02-2013, 12:29 PM
But it sounded as if he thought he could buy it and someone else would run it....while he collects the cash.

It's amazing how that dream seems to continually perpetuate itself.

I bet you he is trying to sell the business to someone right now with that as the selling point.

Who knows though, maybe you might be able to buy some customers in your service area from him.

LawnBoy0311
05-02-2013, 01:15 PM
It's amazing how that dream seems to continually perpetuate itself.

I bet you he is trying to sell the business to someone right now with that as the selling point.

Who knows though, maybe you might be able to buy some customers in your service area from him.

I tried to buy some, but he has the mentallity that they are worth a yearly rate. Example....if customer XYZ spends $24,000 a year, he will sell it to me for $24,000. I tried to explain with no contracts, and no long term customers, its hard to justify a cost like that.

He'll come to grips sooner or later.

I understand for other companies, selling at a yearly revenue or 2 year revenue is normal. But lawn care is MUCh different.