View Full Version : Alert: Breaking news!!

05-05-2011, 10:28 AM
I just received this info...

All mini marts, convenient stores, 7-11's, discount smoke shops, resellers of questionable/exotic "smoking equipment", discount liquor stores, seedy inns and roach motels will be closed this week due to death in family.

05-06-2011, 06:54 AM
all so funny............. yet also true :D

The Cleaning Doctor
05-06-2011, 09:42 AM
On another note.....

So, Osama bin Laden is standing before God waiting to hear his punishment, when God gets a tap on the shoulder. Behind him stands 343 firefighters, 72 police officers, one K9 officer, 3,000 American citizens & over 5,000 soldiers. "Don't worry, God, we got this!"

05-19-2011, 07:19 PM
Normally I am not real big on reports or forwards but I couldn't resist this one ...

Bin Ladin has died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates.
George slapped Bin Ladin across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"

Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed!"

James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"

Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Bin Ladin with a long cane and snarled "It was Evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."

The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist Leader.

As Bin Ladin lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared.
Bin Ladin wept and said, "This is not what you promised me."

The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?"